Healthy Choice Portabella Spinach Parmesan

It's not that I haven't been eating microwavable meals; it's that I'm a lazy-ass who hasn't blogged about them. Some have been good; others, well...



Calories: 270
WW Points: 5

Their description: Wholesome whole-grain penne pasta with baby portabella mushrooms and iron-rich spinach delivers 15% of your daily vitamin A.

At first glance: I've been saving this, partly because I wasn't craving it, and partly because I knew it was going to be crap. My husband bought me this one. Hey, aren't baby portabella mushrooms just button mushrooms?

Upon closer inspection: It can't taste as bad as it looks, right? Right.....?

Taste: This may just be the nastiest thing I've ever put in my mouth, and that's quite the feat, let me tell you. I like mushrooms just fine, and spinach too, for that matter, but this is just revolting. There's this almost bitter taste in the background, coupled with something I sure hope is lemon juice (just checked the ingredients list -- it is -- thank goodness). I don't taste cheese. The specks of red pepper don't save this one. I had a few bites too many in an effort to try to find something redeeming about this meal, and all I came up with is a sour stomach. I guess they can definitely tout this as "diet food," as I certainly didn't want to eat anything for a long time after consuming this piece of crap.

Overall rating: 0. I really wanted to give it a 1, but even the pasta was soggy. Blegh, Healthy Choice. Blegh.

Lean Cuisine Roasted Honey Chicken

Calories: 280
WW Points: 5

Their description: Roasted chicken in a sweet honey sauce with snap peas, yellow beans and whole wheat pilaf.

At first glance: The chicken looks like chicken. The sauce is orange. I bet brown rice would be better.

Upon closer inspection: That's the flattest orzo I've ever seen. There are five good-sized pieces of chicken. What's with all the beans? Are those onions or mushrooms mixed in with everything? My toddler wants all the carrots. Wait, are those lentils? What the heck?

Taste: I'm not a fan of whole wheat pasta, and now I'm really not a fan of whole wheat pasta. I was right; brown rice would have been way better. I'm guessing the lentils were for added fiber, and I love lentils, but not in this. I also like beans, but again, not in this. The chicken was good, as were the carrots (at least, the ones my kid let me have) and the snap peas. Oh, and those little things mixed in were indeed onions. The sauce was sweet and slightly spicy. But I guess the pasta and lentils did their job; I'm pretty full, amazingly enough. I just don't see how they can call this "Spa Cuisine." Give me a break.

Overall rating: 6 -- it has promise; with brown rice I probably would have given it an 8.

Michelina's Lean Gourmet Shrimp Scampi

Calories: 290
WW Points: 6

Their description: Angel hair pasta in a light, white wine sauce with tender shrimp, crisp carrots and juicy tomatoes. Rich, fresh and delicious.

At first glance: The sauce is yellow. Smells good, though. Don't see the tomatoes.

Upon closer inspection: I didn't know angel hair looked like a nappy-ass clown wig. It's spaghetti at best; don't kid yourself, Michelina. My husband gave me a spoon to eat this with when he pulled it out of the microwave. At first I was like, "A spoon? C'mon, it's pasta." But apparently I've been transported back in time, either that or Michelina likes to believe everyone's five years old and needs their pasta cut up into little 1-inch strands. Thanks. Thanks a bunch. There isn't much shrimp, but what do you expect for a dollar? I see the carrots. Still no tomatoes.

Taste: Not bad. The pasta is horrible soggy to the point that it's almost inedible. Luckily (or not), I was too hungry to care. There are seven tiny salad-size shrimp, which isn't too bad after all. The sauce is more salty than anything else, but I still detect a nice buttery, garlicky-ness. I'd eat it, again. It's just not a fave. Of course, for a dollar, you can't do much better.

Overall rating: 5

Michelina's Budget Gourmet Chinese-style Vegetables & White Chicken

Calories: 310
WW Points: 6

Their description: A delicious rich sauce with crisp Chinese-style vegetables and white meat chicken served over fluffy white rice.

At first glance: Ah, if only it looked as good as the food.

Upon closer inspection: I can find the chicken (I think), but veggies? I think not. A few slivers of carrot and green pepper just don't cut it.

Taste: Bleh. Salty, boring. The mushy sauce is just... ick. There's very little flavor in any of it. I don't know what makes this "Chinese-style," other than the fact that they probably used some soy sauce. An insult to every Asian who ever lived or will live. This one lives up to its $0.77 pricetag.

Overall rating: 1 (the rice wasn't terrible, so it gets a point for that)

Michelina's Budget Gourmet Szechwan-style Vegetables & White Chicken

Okay, before anyone judges me, it was $0.77. That's SEVENTY-SEVEN cents. I'd be freaking nuts not to try it.



Calories: 280
WW Points: 5

Their description: Crispy Szechwan vegetables nestled in a rich and tangy Asian-inspired sauce with noodles and white chicken.

At first glance: Dang, this is a tiny-ass bit of food.

Upon closer inspection: Noodles, sauce, peppers, carrots... I smell the ginger. That's nice.

Taste: Surprisingly tasty. There's a good zing in that sauce, all gingery and garlicky... Okay, so the noodles were a bit soggy. And the chicken, a bit spongy. And this isn't enough food to satisfy my 9-month-old. But the flavors were good. It could be a good snack. Meal? Meh. If you're the size of a fetus, maybe.

Overall rating: 7

Lean Cuisine Chicken Florentine Lasagna

Calories: 280
WW Points: 6

Their description: Chicken Florentine Lasagna with white meat chicken, spinach and vegetables.

At first glance: Where's the chicken? Nevermind that -- where's the LASAGNA?

Upon closer inspection: It really is swimming in that sauce, isn't it? Looks very soggy. What a shame.

Taste: Bland. Then garlic. Bland. Then a bit of cheese. But mostly bland. If there really were veggies in this lasagna, it might have more taste. Do they put hardly any in there to appeal to more people, or what? What's the point of calling it "florentine" if it has hardly any spinach in there at all? Boo, Lean Cuisine. Boo.

Overall rating: 2

Kashi Lemongrass Coconut Chicken

Calories: 300
WW Points: 6

Their description: Chicken with broccoli florets, carrots, and sugar snap peas are all served over our Kashi Seven Whole Grains and Sesame® with red quinoa pilaf. It’s then topped with a lemongrass coconut sauce and coconut flakes.

At first glance: Lots of veggies, chicken, and shredded coconut. Some grains other than rice.

Upon closer inspection: Smells AMAZING.

Taste: I really like the quinoa pilaf. The flavors are so fresh and delicious. Nice and mild. Nothing's overly sweet. If I have one complaint, it's that the chicken's a little "blah," but it's hard to get chicken right in a frozen entree.

Overall rating: 9